Beware the lazy river Nazis!!!
A group of us took advantage of mutual days off from work together to go visit Six Flags Great America last Thursday. Yes, Thursday: a day of the week you’d expect people to be working or going back to school or whatever the hell people do on Thursday. Not true. Case in point — the line for one of the rides at the end of the day was 2 1/2 hours (which we all refused to wait in).
Part of the reason for the trip in the first place was the new addition to the theme park, a water park called Hurricane Harbor. Sure, admission to the water park is included with admission to the theme park, but what they don’t tell you is that the water slides/attractions are policed the same way the roller coasters are. Want to enjoy the lazy river? Go right ahead, but on your second pass around look out for the Lazy River Nazis, taking your tube lest you (gasp!) float around for a few more minutes and deny some fat, hairy man from Iowa his chance to use two tubes to float his ass in the lazy river too.
Did I mention the wave pool that 1) is only open for approximately 40 minutes of every hour because 2) they only run the waves when the pool is devoid of people? Good times those were not.
So anyways, if anyone plans on making the trip to Gurnee anytime soon I’d highly recommend waiting until all the little Illinois punks go back to school so that you actually have a chance to enjoy the park and not just wait in line all day.